valence

"You're tough. You never seem to let things get you down."

I dont like doing the "get away, i'll bite" facade but it's the most effective in case you dont realise.

So i've been holding on to this mode of defense for almost well, 4 years now. Okay, it's not so harsh nowadays, the shield flares only when needed.

I dont feel secure lots of time.

Just that, i refuse to admit it.

I've never been one that's sanguine.

The harder someone tries to attack me and what i hold close, that person usually ends up worst.

The reason being simply because i dont falter due to their words and actions.

The people around me have disappointed me on numerous counts. I've learnt to hold the fort myself.

I understand and i agree with the line "No one is an island*" but i do think that you have to have confidence in yourself before you can rely on external help. If not, you'll only be used and manipulated.

I try not to take unpleasant things to heart cause one can never expect the whole world to love you.

I laugh when i'm sad so i can forget my fears and worries.

I'm hot-headed. I'm harsh. I'm hyper. I'm callous. I'm cold. I'm offensive. I'm fun-loving. I'm eccentric. I'm anti-social.

But i'm not as tough as i want to be.



I just want you to believe i am.